The Tortoise Had It Right

Now see what you've done? Peer pressure, peer pressure; my life is nothing but giving in to peer pressure. So what if my dial-up connection on my computer was slow, it taught me patience and humility and, er, patience. But, no, I had to give in and buy Verizon's version of DSL, mainly because the timing was right due to their how-can-you-turn-this-down offer of practically giving it away for the first year. A sucker for a good coupon, me.

I should have just forked over the money to have 'em come over and install it but, again, the "easy" self-install package was free (even better than a coupon). When the box arrived I was totally intimidated by the variety of hardware and hid my head in the sand for a few days. I even left a message for my favorite tech dude, Dorian, asking if he would make a housecall. Unfortunately, he didn't return the contact and today, what the hell, I gave it a fling; full speed ahead.

The tutorial said to allow one hour for installation and I took it slowly and step-by-step, only clutching my temples once when I couldn't find an "Ethernet port" on my computer. Although not labeled as such there was a logical hole back there and I figured I would just plug my cord in there and if it was wrong, well, I could always bang my head against the wall; that would fix it. I did not want to call Verizon's help desk, that's as bad as asking for driving directions.

Anyway, short story too long, I've given birth to DSL even though it took me two hours. However, my new DSL is annoying the hell out of me because there is a thicket of new junk to wade through just to get back to my basic functions, like getting this blog to work. I should have listened to the twang of my basic instincts and stuck to the "old ways" because I don't even care that everthing is a tad faster. I know my mind is stuck in the past while my fingers reach for the stars, but the computer age is having the last laugh as I fumble the hand-off. Say what?

So now my TimeWarner cable box is obsolete and I have to either take it in for a free exchange or pay for installation; and the "check engine" light is on in my car, timed exactly coincidentally to my needing this years' inspection sticker. I think I need to call Ghost Busters.